Defining our boundaries can limit our personal growth. To say I am loyal to one thing, has the potential to put a barrier in the way of our own discovery. It is so easy to say that because I am a person of integrity I must remain firmly planted in the garden of a past revelation. To do so can set you up for a future without color. Of missed opportunities. Most importantly, to do so can leave you stuck. Incapable of moving passed what could be a pinnacle. The one great chance that life has thrown you to be your best self.
It is here that I must come clean. I am choosing today to let myself off the hook. I am allowing myself to feel the hurt of those things unresolved because I can now see plainly that if I do not, I will continue to live in this space of mourning. I will admit that I have been wronged and that I am seeking to forgive for the wrong done. I am giving half of the responsibility back to her. I can see clearly how taking it all on has not done anyone good. It had become a shield behind which I could safely hide. The mirror served it’s purpose and it is time to look back out into the world to gain a deeper understanding of how to use the lessons learned. To not recreate the missteps. To work toward getting myself whole. Chalk it up to another valuable lesson learned. The crux of which being that no amount of wishing will get you to the finish line.
It takes time.
And it helps not to have to do it alone.